Confessions Of A Sex Blogger

Confessions Of A Sex Blogger:

My sex blogger flag is flying at half mast for Otto's Spanking Blog.  I clicked on the link this morning only to find it had been removed. Otto was a femdom artist. I really enjoyed his work and have used some of it to adorn this post. Farewell Otto. You will be missed.

It's always a little sad when a favorite blog is removed. I think I understand why it happens though. I have thought about removing this blog several times. Sometimes I feel like I have nothing left to say. Other times blogging makes me feel like I have revealed too much of myself; like I am leaving pieces of my spleen scattered around the Internet for anonymous strangers to poke with a stick. 

When I started this blog I was a man with a mission.  I had so many thoughts I wanted to share; so many questions I wanted to ask, a lot of confusion to clear up. In that regard the blog has served its purpose. I feel a lot clearer now about a lot of things. 

I feel less inclined to share the private details of my relationship with Her Majesty these days. She is a very private person so I try not to air our dirty laundry in public.  I only discuss our occasional turbulence in a very general way if I think it may be of help to others. 




I no longer expect to receive much relevant advice when I post about our relationship. Many folks have preconceived ideas about how a D/s relationship is supposed to work that probably don't apply to us. To a large extent the secret of our success has been remaining flexible and rolling with the punches. We put our love for each other first and let the chips fall where they may.  One of the problems with accepting anonymous advice is that people on the Internet are often not who they say they are. The kind dominant lady leaving a comment may actually be a dude furiously wanking in front of his computer screen.

I still enjoy sharing about our “sessions” together.  Her Majesty jokingly tells me I just like writing porn. When I describe our play everything I write about actually happened. If I ever switch to writing fiction I will let you know. 

I have to be careful not to compare what I write here to what other people write about their relationships.  I don't want to compare my insides to other people's outsides.  Her Majesty and I love each other and we are very happy together.  I have a pretty good idea what I can expect from our relationship and I don’t think it will change anytime soon. I have learned to be grateful for the wonderful gifts I have been given. I no longer suffer from the “grass is always greener” syndrome. I don’t obsess about taking my submission deeper or pushing our D/s relationship to the next level.  I try to live by the old adage “it is better to want what you have than to have what you want”.

Blogging has been very positive and therapeutic for me. It is has helped me work through a lot of things I used to struggle with. Though I am not actively seeking advice I often learn new things from what people have to say.  Blogging provides a healthy outlet for my kinky soul.  It can be lonely feeling like the only chocolate chip floating in a sea of vanilla. I don’t always have to put up posts that are deep and meaningful. Keeping things fun, sexy and light is sometimes preferable.

I enjoy the process of letting my thoughts spill out then whittling them down until they are polished and precise. I am always amazed how many unnecessary words I am able to strip away. I also enjoy choosing images for my posts. As long as blogging remains fun for me I expect I will continue doing it. Being a sex blogger has become part of my identity.  I blog therefore I am. 

Images by Otto